Questions

We have been instructed to pass a notebook back and forth to the school with comments and questions regarding our son. Today we asked why the case manager wasn't at our meeting last week. The answer: "Since the meeting is administrative, and not about M's IEP, I was told I didn't need to be there." Since we talked at length about the case manager, and the statements made to the Deputy Sheriff, as well as the IEP, it would have been good for her to be there to talk things out and move forward.

A dear friend told me...

A person dear to my heart told me something I thought I would share. As a parent of a special needs child, or children as the case may be, we need to celebrate the good things in their lives. Lately, I have been engulfed in the negative aspects of trying to deal with their lives.

Their lives are so much more complex than mine. The simple joys of getting through a morning, or afternoon without problems should be a celebration. Getting through a whole day is a victory. If that is the case, then what is a week of good days worth?

We had a good week, both in school and at home. That should be celebrated. Because it is a HUGE Victory. It is a positive way to begin the next week. Sometimes, victory occurs first with small beginnings.

A celebration such as this in the life of one of our boys is huge.

A person dear to my heart also said that I shouldn't forget about my wife. Together we are team that goes against considerable odds on behalf of our children. We sometimes forget that we are more to each other than a source of income, a meal, a warm bed, or someone to yell at when times are tough.

We forget the things in our lives that made us a team before we had kids. The love that we share. To remember these things is not to forget the children. We are a team. We need to work on that as well as all of the things we do for our kids. These things need to be nurtured, lest they be lost.

And then I think about my girls. They help us make our home what it is. Ready to help. Sometimes with complaint... :) I can't forget the girls. Be it helping to cook supper, or wrangling the boys so mom and dad can talk about the day privately, they are ready with a quick joke, a grin, and hugs when needed.

We tell them we want them to be teenagers. I am proud of the young ladies they have become. I don't want to embarrass them so won't say more, because I know they will read this... thanks girls!!!

Noticed something

Since the school thinks the blog is gone, everyone talks to me again. What exactly are they afraid of? I only post the things that happen to one of the kids on this blog, either good or bad. What is so bad about that?

I don't much care if they like me or not. What I do care about is how they treat my kids.

Probation Officer Conversation

I talked with the probation officer today for M. She hasn't gotten the police report from the incident yet - the incident happened three weeks ago. I explained that the school said the report was wrong, and that when we asked them to contact the sheriff's office to get it corrected, the school told us it was our responsibility to get it corrected. She also told us that M is getting a new probation officer because she is no longer going to handle cases from our county. How frustrating. She thinks it is odd that the school would first state that the report is wrong, and then state that it was our responsibility to get it corrected. She didn't think that was right.

She did say that they would be in touch as soon as the police report came in.

Underground Blogger

I have taken my blog underground. Seems like some people in the school district took offense to it. They felt threatened by it. So here it is. ndfatheroffive.blogspot.com no longer exists. welcome to afatherofmany.blogspot.com. You need an invite to even be able to read this. As a result, if you know someone who would benefit from reading my blog, let me know their email address. as long as they are not affiliated with our school district, I will let them in. That said, please don't share what you read here with your school district. They might take offense and feel threatened by it. I won't tell you what school district we are in. :)

Paperwork

I wish that all of these agencies that we work with for special needs kids would share intake information. More paperwork. Are there any trees left in the world? I have taken to asking if there is an online form I can fill out. The answer is always no. It wouldn't be so bad, but every form asks for the same information. What happened to the paperwork reduction act?

End of a Good Week

M had a good week over all.  I told the speech therapist not to engage M in any power struggles. 

Talked with Protection and Advocacy (P and A) on Friday.  Signed a bunch of releases so that they can look at his school, psych, and probation records.  Faxed copies of the Sheriff report to their office, as well as our copy of the IEP, witness statements, and other information we thought important.  She made the comment that it sounded like the school needed an education in how to work with someone like M.

Spent some time talking to the school counselor. He didn't understand why three different stories were told by the people who were there the day M experienced his break down.

Evidently the aide that was working in Special Ed with M has been released from employment at the school.  I wonder if this is in retaliation for her statement on the day of the incident. 

On this coming Thursday we will have our second meeting with the school.  It is scheduled for 1 to 4 on Thursday.  Hopefully P and A can be there.

I am reading From Emotion to Advocacy by the Wrights from wrightslaw.com.